New figures from the Office For National Statistics show that while the divorce rate continues to fall overall, the trend is not mirrored by the over-fifties.
We are now the only group whose divorce rate is actually rising. At 51 years old and single, I am now part of a growing group surfing a zeitgeistian wave of plus freedom.
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And, in my experience, this is the best age yet for flying solo. In my teens, I waited by the phone for a boy, any boy, to call. In my twenties it was all high drama, getting my heart broken and dating rotters. During my thirties, my biological clock meant I needed a partner if I wanted children. My forties were spent dealing with the romantic hangover of my thirties — divorce and being a single parent to small children. There is such a joy to being able to do whatever you want without permission.
Her life was completely uncompromised and I can entirely relate to her contentment. As a nutritionist and hypnotherapist, I see many fiftysomething women. They come to me because they want to lose their menopausal tummies. Yet, dig a little deeper, and what they really want to divest themselves of is the big lump in the armchair called their husband. Their comfort eating and drinking is often a symptom of their unhappiness — but a fear of being alone stops them from tackling the real problem. I am lucky though. My mother is pretty self-sufficient, for now.
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My children are becoming more independent and this is my golden time. We started chatting but never had a proper conversation, both logged in at different times. One day he sent me a message and gave me his mobile number. Since then we have been communicating via WhatsApp. We fell in lov e. He decided to come to Malaysia and he did. He flew from Yogjakarta and reached Malaysia on March 1st. On March 4th, we got married! I found my love and so did he!
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We fell in love. After joining Oasis and not having much luck I was about to give up when I got an email with suggested matches. One took my eye nokiauk. So I took the plunge and message first. I mean, "Tindering" is just as much of a verb as swiping at this point. Tinder may not want to advertise as such, but we all know what it's mostly used for. You're quite literally deciding if you want to interact with someone based on nothing but profile pictures and a quote from The Office , so yeah, you can see how getting laid would be the main goal of most users — but hey, we all know those couples who met on Tinder and have been together for years.
It's fast, easy, and if there's one app that even the shyest, most skeptical people will be on, it's Tinder. You may get carpal tunnel from swiping so much, but I guess that also means that it's nearly impossible to not find someone who's DTF. It's free for general use, but Tinder does offer two upgrades: Tinder Plus and Tinder Gold. These include extras like undoing a left swipe bless , send "Super Likes" to people you're really into, and in the case of Tinder Gold, see which users have liked your profile.
Best for shy guys and confident girls. Bold ladies who like to make the first move or ladies who are just tired of guys thinking nasty pick-up lines are good opening messages. It's the dating app version of the Sadie Hawkins dance, created by ex-Tinder employees ooh, drama.
It pushes some women out of their comfort zone, but it's a nice change of pace. And if you don't message, you could possibly be un-matching with the love of your life, and that's way worse than being ignored. It also takes the pressure off of dudes who feel like they need to start the conversation every time. We knew you were gonna ask, so yes, with same-sex matches either party can start things off. Matches expire after 24 hours so you can't agonize over that opening line for too long, and your match list won't be filled with people you forgot you matched with 57 weeks ago.
You'll see pictures and short bios of potential matches in your area and can swipe right if you're interested and left if you're not. It's a pretty close mock of Tinder, except for the fact that Bumble relieves the anxiety of accidentally swiping left on a hottie by letting you backtrack. Bumble also offers a BFF feature to find strictly platonic friends and a LinkedIn-ish networking feature called Bizz in attempts to remind everyone that it's not just a hookup app. Bumble is free but also offers Bumble Boost for extra features, including rematching an expired match.
Best for queer women tired of heteronormative apps. Apps like Tinder and Bumble want to say they're for all sexual orientations, but they're constantly throwing in male matches when you've specified you only want women. It's either that, or your pool is filled with straight girls just looking to "make friends.
HER is the award-winning mix of dating and social media that lets you meet girls you know are girls and not nasty men trying to pose as girls , as it requires a Facebook for signup and is solely for lesbian, bisexual, and queer women. You don't see that often, and if you do, it's some highly sexualized fantasy thing for guys to drool over. HER was made by queer women, for queer women, which was a much-needed safe space in the world of online dating. Claiming to "introduce you to every lesbian you've ever wanted to meet," HER is the perfect place to go if you're tired of the only lesbian you know being your ex girlfriend.
As the user base grows at a seriously impressive pace especially in large cities , HER will help you widen your dating pool beyond the people you already know IRL. Profiles are minimalistic and encourage you talk, and it's way more chill and comfortable than traditional swiping apps. But HER goes way past being a hookup app — that is, without adding pressure to find a romantic partner. While it can be used to couple up and find local matches that you never knew existed, you can also get involved in local LGBTQ events, read LGBTQ news, and make friends through its social-media like feed.
Best for gay guys, obviously. Most of these guys have no chill and unsolicited dick pics will run rampant, but it's the ideal gay paradise if you're tired of Tinder or Bumble throwing women into your pool when you specifically opted out. Grindr has been the go-to for gay and bi men since , and that's because finding someone to talk to is damn near instantaneous.
Most users just looking to hook up will let you know right off that they're not trying to make small talk. However, in , Grindr launched their thoughtful LGBTQ online magazine called Into, in efforts to make itself look more like a lifestyle brand and less like a hookup app. According to Mashable's MJ Franklin , Into is one of the most interesting digital magazines on the internet.
Now you really can say you're just on Grindr for the articles. Grindr also announced that they're working on an option for users to notify potential partners of their STD status as a way to stop the spread of infections among dating app users particularly HIV and AIDS.
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The app is free for basic use, but you can opt for an upgrade to Grindr XTRA to unlock other features like read receipts, an "online-only" viewing option, no ads, and more. Best for super picky people. Picky people looking for something super specific in a partner. And guys, this is not the place for the younger millennials: Rather than being thrown into an endless pool of profiles, EliteSingles lets you pick out exactly what you're looking for. You'll be given a limited number of matches curated for you using 29 extremely detailed, professional-level algorithms based on the popular Five Factor Personality Test.
They'll even show you your own results in comparison to those of potential matches to see how you stack up. Like eharmony , the stuff to fill out is pretty lengthy — but that's what you want if you're looking for a lasting relationship, and this helps ensure that you aren't swiping through tons of people that aren't your type.
Slow and steady wins the race, right? Another unique thing is that there are separate pools based on location, religion, ethnicity, age, and sexual orientation. You can even break it down by profession if — for example, if you are or were a teacher, you might only want to date someone who was also a teacher.
All profiles are also verified manually with an upscale Fraud Detection System. As you could have expected from the fancy-sounding name, EliteSingles is the most expensive of the bunch but we say worth it. Best for people who believe in love at first sight.
People constantly falling in love with strangers on the street who then spend hours scouring the Missed Connections section of Craigslist. Everyone would love for the story of how they met their person to be something serendipitous and crazy, like meeting your husband in the Starbucks line — but let's be real, the chances of that happening completely on its own aren't great. Happn acts as a wingman that steps in and introduces two strangers by alerting app users of cuties who are physically close by in real time.
AskMen's review said it best: Perfect for rom com enthusiasts or for anyone who likes to ogle hotties on public transportation and who's secretly hoping they might be doing the same. No, really — one of my friends literally watched a guy next to her on the train "like" her on Happn. If anything, it's a chance to decrease your number of missed opportunities in public when you get too shy to speak up.
Best for picky, career-motivated millennials. The League Free version: Bougie millennials who are career-motivated and looking for an equally ambitious partner. This is the place to come if you're tired of meeting people who don't value hard work and never Venmo you when they say they will. Referred to as "Tinder for elites," The League is the dating app version of those really exclusive clubs that always have a line around the corner, terrifying bouncers, and a crazy cover.
Okay, that kind of sounds like it's for assholes, but it's actually a comforting alternative if you're not trying to be thrown to the wolves like you would be on Match.